Update: Comments have been hidden on this article. I'm disappointed in some of the takes - we're better than this, Out of Cards community.
Blizzard has tweeted from the official Hearthstone Esports account stating that Paul "Zalae" Nemeth has been suspended from all Hearthstone Esports events. Zalae was due to play in the Hearthstone Grandmasters event which has its groups matches being played off-stream starting today in roughly an hour from this post.
Quote From @HSEsports Hearthstone Esports is aware of allegations made against Americas Grandmaster, Paul "Zalae" Nemeth. Upon further review, we have suspended Zalae from competing in all Hearthstone Esports events.
If you are involved in a domestic abuse situation, here is a list of hotlines that can provide you with support and resources.
For context, Rini accused Zalae of abuse during their relationship back in January of this year.
Quote From Rini I really don't think much will come of this, Zalae will likely deny or just duo stream with some friends, maybe take some time off, go visit his current girlfriend, whatever it takes to ignore discussing it. But I'm tired of keeping quiet and I really wanted his current girlfriend to see this because honestly, I can't deal with the idea of her possibly getting hurt like this or worse, and it would be on my conscience for not speaking up.
I tried to record this MANY times keeping his name out of my mouth but the editing was just too painful and I gave him multiple chances to speak to me regarding these things despite my therapist's direct orders to never speak with him again, but all have been unanswered and the more recent one has been sitting for over a month, and he's chosen not to say anything.
I'm going in order of big things > small
The last night we lived together, Zalae repeatedly was taunting/body posturing at me like he was going to hit me, closing me into small spaces, making himself appear bigger/threatening and physically grabbing my wrists tightly to hold me in the small spaces (there were about 10 - 13 occasions where I told him to back away because he was scaring me, and he would back away "oh gosh, sorry, you're right" before simply doing it again, all the meanwhile yelling at me with his face right in front of mine and refusing to sit down and compromise, which I had been trying to do the entire time
-This resulted in me giving 2 open-handed arm slaps I laid on the middle of his arm (-the biggest part- he's way bigger than me & I didn't use real force behind it, it was a warning because words were not helping and he was very scary)-
I was very clear to him about how he was scaring me and repeatedly vocalized this and kept moving my position to give myself more space so he would realize how enclosed I had been, but he continued closing me in and backing me into the counters or walls.
The second slap resulted in him physically picking me up and dragging me to the bedroom, throwing me on the bed, physically got on top of me and put a pillow over my face while holding me down, effectively suffocating me until I managed to get a breath to yell "I can't breathe!!"
He was in such a rage, he perhaps didn't even see what he was doing but I guess that snapped him out of it, so he got off of me. Woke me up early the next morning and he told me I had less than 24 hours to get out of his house and that -I- was abusive and he didn't feel safe.
I can't believe I believed him. But he also refused to listen to anything I would say about what he did, and in his mind I seriously believe he thinks because he didn't physically hit me, that somehow washes away his actions.
Zalae was incredibly emotionally abusive, telling me things like "you're not good enough" and "you're on a maternal clock, so you need to be better/what I want before you run out of time to have kids"
Oh, also - Get this.
Apparently he HAS to cum every day (which I accommodated) but when I explain I get off better with oral, he demands I apologize and says it's a big ask/time commitment because he had done it recently.
He would often argue just to be the winner of an argument (the FEW we had that were all small and insignificant) rather than usual level-headedness.
It was all about control. How dare I stand up for myself.
He needs serious help.
He needs to go to anger management.
He needs to realize he was in the wrong and that he instigated and intentionally threatened me with his body language and then eventually actual force because I wanted to compromise and he couldn't stand that he wasn't "winning the argument" instead of working with his girlfriend on an issue he was fully aware of.
The most frustrating part is, we really clicked, we really got along and I was never under the impression anything was wrong until he would come to me, frustrated that I wasn't working out enough. Like seriously, that was his reasoning even though we were going on walks/runs every day. He brought this up every 2-3 weeks for the 10 weeks I lived there despite acting like everything was perfectly fine otherwise.
He refused to help me along the way with working out for example until I really pulled his teeth about it and begrudgingly did so.
I frequently made myself available to him, but he expected me to simply do things because that's what he expected.
He's a control freak and it's really obvious he viewed us as a transactional relationship, nothing more. His lack of respect towards me has been appalling and I tried to not talk about it because I didn't want to affect his career but I'm sick of being quiet. His girlfriend deserves to know and I can't move on without this being said.
I've removed myself from the Hearthstone community because I just can't deal being around it/him despite having so many friends and people I respect in it.
I have had immense anxiety about going live because I don't know what to do anymore, or who I should be.
This is also a large reason I've been in search of community management/social media management positions, because honestly this has really ruined a lot about streaming as a whole for me.
I don't really have variety friends who I think want to play games with me, and I just feel like this break up has taken so much from me. But I needed to say this so you can all understand my hiatus and why I've felt so trapped and confused lately.
I don't know what else to say, but I'm open to answer more questions, because I definitely missed things between these two.
Oh, also if you want to continue supporting him, that's your prerogative, and I'm not suggesting you stop. But I also want you to know he's kind of shitty.
Thanks for listening/reading.
FWD: Thank you to those who encouraged me to speak up. I couldn't have done this without each of you.
Comments
Alright, since this entire comment section is a warzone I feel like I need to break this down on a (mostly) objective level.
One one hand we have people who are sympathetic to the alleged (in a legal sense, calm down) victim, share their own thoughts on her and Zalae as they perceive them and are inclined to believe her story based on how it is presented.
On the other hand we have people who refuse to immediately condemn the guy on accusations that lack tangible evidence outside of the victim's account.
Both of these sides are valid, yet both miss some crucial elements.
First of all, the argument that false accusations are statistically rare, while true, should never be used as justification for "just believe the accuser by default". Due process and innocent until proven guilty are still an essential part of any legal (or in this case, court of public opinion) process. Referring to stastistics in order to debunk individual cases is a fallacy. Just because something is unlikely to happen doesn't mean you get a free pass.
Second of all, the other side appears to miss the fact that this is NOT a legal issue. We are not talking about criminal accusations that could result in legal action. Rini, at least to my knowledge, hasn't, at any point, claimed that she wants "justice" or "revenge" or what have you. All she did was tell a personal story out of (according to her) a personal need to inform Zalae's current and future partners about his behaviour, with the additional intent of (according to her) wanting to reach through to him and really show him the extent of his abusive behaviour. The fact that people are framing this as if she's deliberately trying to ruin his life is simply disingenouus. That COULD be her motivation, but there is literally no indicator that it is, meaning that you are now similarly trying to ascribe wrongdoing to her, without having any tangible evidence yourself. If I go on Youtube and tell people how much of a dick a previous accquaintance was, I am not obligated to provide conclusive evidence because I am not insinuating that they did something illegal.
The situation we have on our hands is a single individual coming out about something that clearly has been weighing on her mind for a while. This is most likely therapeutic while also being fueled by a need to "warn" other people. She does all this without ever actually calling for Zalae to be punished/cancelled/whatnot. If anything, this is the RIGHT way to do these kinds of things. If you disagree with this statement it means that you believe that nobody should ever be able to disclose their negative experiences with other people unless they have concrete evidence.
Yes, false accusations, even ones without legal repercussions, have negative effects on people's lives. That is called reputation and it is a core part of human interactions. This is not something we can ever have full control over and trying to completely remove it will just leave you with even more problems.
As it stands, we have the following facts:
-Rini stated her side of the story, her motivation, and her desire to not hurt Zalae's life beyond trying to warn his current/future partners about his "shortcomings" since she feels it's her responsibility. All of this is understandable from an empathetic perspective and there is nothing that suggests she is lying for personal gain or out of revenge (so far).
-Zalae himself has not responded to these allegations (as of yet). This means that we DO NOT HAVE HIS SIDE OF THE STORY. This, however, is his problem. If you get accused of something, it is your responsibility to defend yourself. The fact that he has failed to do this since January at the very least gives the appearance that he does not have a counterclaim. Sure, you can argue that maybe he is preparing some larger legal statement, but that would be very unusual seeing how he was never accused of illegal behaviour in the first place. To sum it up: the ball was in his court and he didn't pick it up. As a result it just isn't possible to "take his side" because he doesn't have one. He couldn't even be bothered to deny it.
-Blizzard did not "fire" Zalae based on baseless accusations. As people pointed out, this shit has been out since the start of the year. The only reason why Blizzard responded now is because of public pressure. Whether or not you agree with it or not is irrelevant, because at the end of the day regardless of the truth, this is the correct PR choice to make by a company trying to maintain their public image. Zalae was suspended based on allegations he himself failed to contest in any way whatsoever. If Blizzard DIDN'T suspend him they would effectively be stating "we are aware of the allegations, but chose to ignore them on account of them not being a big deal". Regardless of whether they are doing the right thing morally, they are OBLIGATED to make the right business decision.
Honestly, I'm pretty disappointed that some people on here are completely incapable of applying nuance to a situation that obviously has more layers to it.
"Innocent until proven guilty", as important as it is, does not free you of the responsibility of contesting the accusations. Zalae failed to defend himself in any shape or form, which is a terrible decision regardless of the truth. Even if he is absolutely guilty of everything and fearing for his reputation, the least he could have done was acknowledge the claims and give a half-assed apology. The only thing that makes you look worse than a false accusation is a lack of response...because then people have no choice other than to assume your guilt.
At the same time, I'm fairly put off by people parroting the "just believe the victims" narrative, because despite all the statistics, it still massively hurts the actual credibility of victims, since the veryy few outliers that maliciously lie for their personal gain will just abuse this general attitude to further their own means. This doesn't means you have to be a fence-sitter or aren't allowed to take Rini's side (fucking hell, I'm on her side, she has presented no contradicting information and her sentiments are entirely relatable) but for fuck's sake, realize that at the end of the day that is all based on your subjective understanding of the situation and making absolute judgement calls based on incomplete information only ends up in pointless virtue signalling. And no, arguing that "well he did always come off as kind of an asshole" is fucking stupid and a prime case of confirmation bias.
The only objective statement about this whole thing is that Zalae is too incompetent to defend himself. Everything else comes down to speculation, so unless you have concrete evidence you should refrain from talking about "the truth" and instead just state your personal opinion on the matter and then leave it there.
This is the best take in this comment section imo. There are things I disagree with, like you saying she does not mean to target his income or get him fired. Which she would obviously know something like this would achieve. This is a good thing if true, but heinous if not.
You also mention that he should have responded earlier, and would have no need for legal action or a "real reason" to remain silent. If you look at what happened to slazzo, where he also waited months to respond to his allegations which we know now are not true. He was setting up a lot of proof since apology videos made without sense and without facts that are ready to be layed out people ignore. I dont think silence equals guilt, I think guilt equals guilt. Theres a reason we have the fifth amendment AND due process in america.
just to clarify, I don't think she didn't know what would happen to his career, I'm just saying it's not her actual intent (or at least her proposed motive is credible). She couldn't have talked about the whole thing without that being an inevitable consequence.
Also, I'm not trying to imply that silence = guilt (although I may have phrased that one poorly), but rather that in this specific situation where it would literally just be word vs word it's incredibly irresponsible to not come out with some sort of reaction or acknowledgement.
The Slazo thing was a bit different because he actually got gaslit into thinking he did something way worse than what was actually the case while also being dogpiled by the entire commentary scene. Zalae just wasn't under nearly as much pressure while also having way less severe allegations levied against him.
Point is: He fucked up by not being able to respond in any fashion whatsoever, which means that regardless of the truth, he is at least partially responsible for what is happening to him now.
Perhaps a good idea to give a link to international abuse helplines should anyone reading this article be in need of support. Doesn't matter what your gender, race or religion is you don't have to endure it - no one should. Reach out for help if you or someone you know needs it.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_domestic_violence_hotlines
Flux please consider adding this to the article itself, or a better link if you have one.
So he didn't hit her or really hurt her in any significant way, he was just a little aggressive, playfully. Is that considered to be horrible abuse today? Probably the entire reason for this "scandal" is that he was the one who broke up with her. It really feels like the main reason she got so upset.
The amount of people putting words into the mouths of people that just want to see actual proof or hearing both sides before lynching this man is disgusting.
YOU THINK ALL WOMEN LIE ABOUT THIS
YOU JUST DONT BELIEVE HER BECAUSE YOURE SEXIST
Everyone deserves due process. Theres a reason its innocent until proven guilty.
To people that want to believe this at face value with zero proof that dont understand how bad the alternative is. Let me introduce you to something I think you might like. It's called a lynch mob.
https://www.nytimes.com/2017/01/27/us/emmett-till-lynching-carolyn-bryant-donham.html
The video is from January, he had a lot of time to comment on it, so if one side doesn't say anything, how does "hearing both sides" work?
There are many cases of false accusations where the accused feel the deck is stacked against them. Like with the 2006 North Carolina lacrosse player false accusation, or the Columbia 2014 mattress girl case. I'm not saying this automatically makes the man innocent. I'm just saying it's possible. Just like its possible there may be rain on a cloudy day. Just because it was just overcast doesnt mean the possibility of there being rain was zero.
If you feel like I do where these cases need as much validity and structure to where no one doubts the outcome. Then you would be on my side and hoping for a formal investigation. And not just believing a victim because they say they are a victim. Our society is built on helping victims which I think is a good thing. But it also opens the door for bad actors. Which cannot and should not be ignored and doing so just because someone makes a youtube video where they are crying is just negligence.
https://johndavis.gonevis.com/how-many-rape-accusations-are-false/
I wouldn't trust a single thing from someone who's written a book titled Women of the Klan: The Foundations of Modern Feminism, in which it is argued that the KKK and classical chivalry provided the philosophical and practical lynchpin for modern feminism.
The article you've presented is an awful, unscientific read with some charts that violate all that is sacrosanct about graphic design. The study it cites looked at 30 cases of known false allegations and concluded from that that 73% of false allegations are made by women. Like... what? How do you extrapolate 73% from a sample size of 30? The false allegations weren't always for abuse either.
I'll provide some quotes for others who chose not to read (click the spoiler for three select quotes):
Quote 1
"Women not rape men at about the same rate as men rape women, but, women also commit all of the false accusations of rape against men, while, female rapists go unreported and unpunished in all aspects."
(no citation, and the grammar mistakes are not mine: also all the false allegations? That's a strong stance to take that I guarantee is way more complex.)
Quote 2
"The late 1980’s and early 1990’s saw some serious studies conducted by the U.S. Air Force, Purdue University, and other institutions, into measuring the rate of false accusations of rape."
(woefully unspecific, what are "other institutions", and what is a "serious" study as opposed to a study?)
Quote 3
We quote from a recent paper of a rape accuser advocate that, contrary to popular belief, the police determine that about 86% of rape claims are unfounded (false).
(Rape claims being unfounded and "never went any further than the police" are two fundamentally different things. One suggests that the police investigated and found that not only was there no crime, but that the accuser was in fact in the wrong. The other suggests it was brought before the police and… nothing happened, for whatever reason. The researcher they cite as quote: (false) without providing counterfactual evidence, was actually making a very careful distinction that the author clearly did not pick up on.)
Don't go peddling pseudo-scientific nonsense that supports your worldview from a man who clearly has an agenda. Took me 10 minutes to take this apart.
Here are several actual studies into false allegations of rape and abuse:
https://www.longdom.org/open-access/the-prevalence-of-false-allegations-of-rape-in-the-united-states-from-20062010-2475-319X-1000119.pdf
(about prevalence in general)
https://www.researchgate.net/publication/342701233_False_Reporting_of_Sexual_Victimization_Prevalence_Definitions_and_Public_Perceptions
(about prevalence and how it is perceived by the public)
https://conflictandhealth.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s13031-020-00301-0
(on the validity of second-hand reports of abuse)
https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/0966369X.2020.1835831
(on male victims of abuse and their conceptualisation of Victim hood (in South Africa)).
There are many, many more you can find on a brief google search.
Have a great day every one.
Well I am on mobile so I will gladly use that as an excuse to why I didnt find better research. I will read the links provided later and maybe make a response, but with just skimming seeing that last one is about south Africa I already doubt the legitimacy overall of at least that article.
The reason I posted the link on it's own was because I was tired of seeing people quote crime statistics from a well know article about false allegations from 2002-10 the linkis biased I'll give that lol, but it does include finding from an FBI study in 2012, which I did read through and is not as hilarious as you claim. Your articles though are from 2020, so I will read them later.
But the point wasnt that the link proved it was a false claim it was that it was possible. There are people who comment here that seem to believe it is never possible for a "victim" to recant their story or falsely accuse someone for their own gain and even though it is a clearly biased article. It does well to show that I felt.
This has the same issue as the whole metoo thing. It's good that abusers and rapists face punishment for their actions, as these people usually just get off the hook easy in a court of law due to a lack of evidence. On the other hand, people no longer get judged in the court of law, they get judged in the court of public opinion now. All it takes is for one person to say something about you and bam, your life is ruined, even if they were lying and malicious in their intent. It turns into a she said he said and the accused person generally ends up being ostracized regardless of circumstances. But unless people just carry voice recording devices on them at all times there really is no other way to flush out the abusers than to speak out. In an ideal world, none of this would be necessary because people would be fucking reasonable. But I won't pretend I have any understanding of what motivates abusers to do what they do. One would think you get into a relationship because you care about the other person, but what do I know. From what I can tell being sane is going out of fashion fast.
There is really no clean way to make an informed statement here. Statistics tell us that false accusations are incredibly rare so really, if you don't decide from the start which side you believe to tell the truth, that's the closest you can come to the truth.
The thing is, in this specific case, Zalae just hasn't really defended himself and it honestly looks like he was just waiting for it to all go away if he just didn't address it. And if you look at alleged victim and abuser's mannerisms, the allegations seem like they... fit. The way zalae presents himself on stream looks less and less like a played character and more of a state of mind. He shows zero empathy, displays very arrogant patterns of interaction with chat and constantly pushes himself to be fitter and more efficient. Meanwhile Rini in her video is fidgety, nervous, intimidated and still somehow worried about Zalae (as in, instead of showing a desire to hurt him or his career, she voices concern about him and his issues).
Taking everything about their profiles into account, Rini's account makes sense. It all fits and if you scroll through the comments, you find a lot of people who know Zalae's mannerisms be entirely unsurprised.
So yeah, personally? I usually believe the victim. And in this case I just also feel very confident in believing the victim.
Going through the comments on this, I feel like this part should be added to every article like this...
Well put. Rini has also repeatedly said that she doesn't want to "cancel" Zalae not to hurt his career but she felt she had to speak up to give herself some peace of mind and bring awareness of his abusive behavior to his current girlfriend. If she was somehow making anything of this up, she could be going after him way harder.
I still find it baffling how so many people find it hard to empathize with the victim who took the immense courage to speak up that they would believe that the probability of the victim acting as a manipulative abuser who is just trying to ruin someone's career is the same as the abuse allegations being true. I understand that there is always a possibility of something like that actually being true, but bringing that small possibility up as an equally valid argument is simply insensitive and illogical, especially after hearing the story and comparing how the two involved parties present themselves to the public.
I do not know either of them. This may or may not be true.
The undeniable fact is that guy's career is crushed,because she said so(she have not even backed up it with some evidence. Like if he was really treating her bad on daily basis it would not be difficult to record some of those). So guys be careful when engaging in relationship with woman.
And for those mentioning his toxic begaviour on streams. It's clue, not evidence(unless he was treating her bad on streams).
I guess you also don't play Rogue, because it only has relatively strong female character portraits?
That is a stupid line of reasoning... "Don't trust them crazy womens, them be the devils with their talks and maybe thems even lie!"
How about that: Don't suffocate people or give them the feeling to be unsafe around you? As many other people said here before, statistically speaking, these acusations are usually not lies. If you actually watched the video you can see (or for you its maybe better to say you see strong hints?) that she is obviously in much distress just talking about it. And you completely ignore the fact, that for her right now its not just going gravy as well, as it often does for the women who go public with their acusations of public figures, as she put herself, adding to the distress the situation/relationship she described caused her, in the middle of this debate as well, getting hate from..... well guys like you I guess.
Leaving aside the issue itself for a moment, I'm very thankful for the staff to post this article. You must have known what will happen in the comments but you didn't shy away from it. The high moral standards of this whole page are a big reason for why I'm coming here every day and I'm proud to name myself a part of this community.
It's truly frightening to see so many defend an abuser such as Zalae and then go onto blame society and the victim. I hope these individuals could develop sympathy for other's misfortune one day.
Shut up